Romanes Eunt Domus

The AP wire filled me in on the all-new edition of Wheelock's Latin, one of my favorite high school textbooks. Well, really the only high school text towards which I have any positive emotion whatsoever, really. So I went to check out the official website to learn more:

The Sententiae Antiquae in each chapter present sources of classical wisdom with accompanying translation exercises and introduce the student to the best authors. Furthermore, LaFleur has amplified the already wide range of prose and poetry selections in the chapter readings. While Cicero, Horace, and Catullus still remain at the center of the text, the witty epigrams of Martial, Trimalchio's teary-eyed comic recitation of his epitaph from Petronius' Satyricon (266), and Seneca's satirical description of the Emperor Claudius' "excremental expiration" (241) are just a few examples of the variety of authors and genres.

I'm actually a bit curious to see just how unabridged their Petronius selection will be, though I vaguely recall that particular section having less barfing and cock jokes than some other passages. But the kids are going to love the Seneca:

Et ille quidem animam ebulliit, et ex eo desiit vivere videri. Exspiravit autem dum comoedos audit, ut scias me non sine causa illos timere. Ultima vox eius haec inter homines audita est, cum maiorem sonitum emisisset illa parte, qua facilius loquebatur: "vae me, puto, concacavi me." Quod an fecerit, nescio: omnia certe concacavit.

"Alas, I think I've shit myself," indeed. And unless I miss my guess, the last line is, roughly, "Whether he did or not, I have no idea; he certainly shit on everything else."